Friday, 6 September 2013

Still Life.



It's been nearly four weeks since my car crash and although my injury is only a broken bone in my hand I still haven't been able to do my job. Occupational Health department don't want me in face-to-face contact with the public in case of physical confrontation which is fair enough.
I could have updated my blog a lot more than I have been doing as I have a fair amount of time on my hands but for some reason I couldn't be arsed and when I did sit down to write something I couldn't think of anything to say.
So here are some of the things I have been doing to pass the time?

Talking with insurance companies, lawyers and vehicle recovery agents. Having a drunk smash into your car generates a large amount of paperwork and creates lots of little jobs for people to do, so in that way I am helping the wheels of commerce spin satisfactorily.

Reading books. Arnold Schwarzenegger's autobiography is so big that picking it up is a workout in itself so I have read this. It's funny how differently I view him when I see him of screen now I have read his autobiography, sort of like I know him. As a book it was more entertaining than I was expecting and his drive is phenomenal.

Growing my hair. I know this is a pastime that requires no concious effort on my part but I usually sport a very short blade two all over but now I have time to kill I thought I would see how long it can get before it looks ridiculous. This is a whole new level of boredom.

Talking to cats.

My wife is at work during the day leaving me on my own in the house apart from three cats. These now look at me in bemusement as I prattle endlessly on at them but steadfastly refuse to answer me.

So there you are, it's not all bad and I have managed to avoid drinking during the day and watching daytime television. Although I do switch on the news when eating my breakfast and lunch but turn it off when I am done.

Anyone got any tips on other things I can occupy my time with. Don't say masturbation, I'm right handed and this is the broken hand. Sensible answers please.

23 comments:

Kianwi said...

What about staging kitty cat olympics? Sure, they probably won't cooperate, but the resulting blog post would by hysterical :)

I would suggest doing a marathon of some show or other. Those are always really fun! Just watch episode after episode all in a row. Soon you'll start to feel as though you are one of the characters in the show.

I hope your hand heals soon and am glad that you didn't have anything worse happen!

Francis Lee said...

Writing your own autobiography and cats are such snobs!

Choleesa said...

Im with Francis Lee...on both

YeamieWaffles said...

Sorry to hear that you've been in pain Tony, especially so that you can't do your work. I have a friend who read the Arnie autobiography and was inspired by him getting up and winning Mr Olympia in the same year he had surgery or something so hopefully that'll be inspiring.

Janie Junebug said...

I didn't know Ah-nold had written an autobiography. Did he write it before or after Maria dumped him? You might consider reading during the day. You can read to the cats.

Love,
Janie

SkippyMom said...

Growing your hair and talking to cats?

And I thought being a SAHM was the pits. YOU WIN! Hands [excuse ONE hand] down. giggle

Now what kind of job do you do that there is a possibility of confrontation with the public? Sounds scary - you're not a police officer, are you? 'Cause in that case, yes. Stay home until you are healed. :)

Take care and get better soon. I'll be thinking of you. Hugs!

SkippyMom said...

Growing your hair and talking to cats?

And I thought being a SAHM was the pits. YOU WIN! Hands [excuse ONE hand] down. giggle

Now what kind of job do you do that there is a possibility of confrontation with the public? Sounds scary - you're not a police officer, are you? 'Cause in that case, yes. Stay home until you are healed. :)

Take care and get better soon. I'll be thinking of you. Hugs!

Tony Van Helsing said...

Kianwi: Cat Olympics, good idea. That'll fill a few hours.

Francis: Mine certainly are.

Choleesa: Me too.

Matthew: Cheers mate, I'm not really in pain. Not like you were with your teeth.

Janie: It's called Total Recall and it does cover his separation from Maria near the end.

Skippy Mom: Yes, I am.

Pat Hatt said...

Get a rhyming cat and he'll talk back all day long. Hmmm let your inner artist free? haha

Jordan said...

You can create a one handed spirit fingers routine or choreograph a one handed version of those ridiculously long rapper secret handshakes that were popular 10 years ago. write, direct, and star in a one handed finger puppet show.

Rob Z Tobor said...

Maybe you could do some cool Macro photography and use it on the blog.

I have to say not having anything to write about has never stopped me writing my blog.....

Vapid Vixen said...

Dress up the cats and make them perform a play. Or, just take pictures of them. I have a hard enough time getting the collar on Erik's cat. Pretty sure she'd stare at me with disdain until I withered away in shame if I ever tried to dress her up.

Juliette said...

I think you should see how big you can make the biceps of your left arm by lifting Arnies biography 100 times a day. Only grow the right side of your hair to aid this balance. Learn Chinese and see if your cats respond to that.
Or....just get pissed by testing and evaluating every ale known to man and pub thus becoming the voice of wisdom.

altadenahiker said...

You could try this and tell me if it works: https://www.pimsleurapproach.com/search286/learn-a-language.asp?sid=005broadLG_286_L10WQRadRed_ggl&Network=Search&kw=learn%20a%20language&ad=28678616105&SiteTarget=&s_kwcid=TC|3792|learn%20a%20language||S||28678616105&gclid=COae1IjRvLkCFcbm7Aod9l4ANQ

Azra said...

Sorry to hear about your car crash and injury Tony. I've had a car accident on Saturday, although luckily I wasn't injured. So I can relate to the awfulness of it all.

Do you watch series' at all? Like Big Bang Theory or Suits? Takes up a chunk of time, that.

Al Penwasser said...

You could use your left hand for some "strange."
Not that I've ever done that. I've just heard about it.
As far as you know.

Al Penwasser said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Al Penwasser said...

Oh, bugger, it entered twice.
Sorry.
Use the left hand twice.

Pk Hrezo said...

Yikes sorry to hear about the accident. I know I'd get a lot of reading and movie watching done.
Cool about Arnold's bio. I need to check that out.

Nicki Elson said...

I have a bunny that talks. No sound comes out, but she moves her little mouth after I say stuff to her and I just know she's talking back. I'm sorry that your cats don't like you as much as my bunny likes me.

I'm also very sorry to hear of your accident. Glad to hear you're feeling well, and I hope all the work the drunk created is resulting in good things for you.

I don't understand why you won't even give Lefty a chance. I think a good use of your time would be to marathon the back episodes of a TV show you've always wanted to watch but never had the time to.

Take care TVH.

Margaret said...

I lean toward binge TV watching. Not very healthy, I suppose. Solitaire?

Michaela said...

Bake muffins.. ;)

Michaela said...

Oh yes.. I forgot about the broken hand mention.. it's gotta be the TV then, laptop, phone, that kinda stuff..