Monday, 1 October 2012

Cough Cough.



Most of the time I don't think about my throat. It gets on with it's business with little or no concious    interference from myself and I am happy with this arrangement.

However for the past two weeks I have had a chest infection that has giving me a hacking, booming cough that makes me sound like a Sea Lion barking for a bucket of fish. This has made my throat very sore.

Now instead of ignoring my throat I am thinking about it all the time.  I never realised how often I  swallow saliva but now I dread it, it seems to be every ten seconds I am swallowing the stuff.  Why am I generating this much? It feels as though I am forcing a splintery wooden chair down my windpipe.

Being at work doesn't help as I am talking all the time while there, in between coughing my lungs inside out.  I don't get ill often but when I do I turn into a quiet, shambling sorry-for-himself wreck who eats far too much comfort food thus adding worries about weight gain into the mix.

My body doesn't feel right and I yearn for the glorious, sun-filled days when I will feel normal again and can run around without wheezing and coughing until green phlegm detaches itself from my lungs and lands on my tongue like a nasty green oyster.

Yeah yeah, I know I am whining soft bastard and some of you reading this are facing truly frightening illness with a courage and fortitude that is admirable, while I have a minor infection that a course of antibiotics is already fixing.

Feel free to pour your scorn upon me, I can take it. Even though I'm poorly. Cough.

17 comments:

Vapid Vixen said...

Really? This thing is going around over there too? I've had it for a week ow and have come to the only logical conclusion that I am never getting better and will have this wretched cold for the rest of my life. Obviously.

Choleesa said...

I finally broke down and got me some antibiotics for what turned out to be a sinus infection...

Love your decriptions by the way!!

Pat Hatt said...

Everybody is sick at my work place with throat and nose crap, trying to avoid them. My damn throat already clicks every time I swallow, that's bad enough.

Janie Junebug said...

I'm not going to heap scorn on you. I feel sorry for you. I'll leave it to Mrs. Van Helsing to heap scorn on you. You're probably keeping her awake with that cough. I once coughed so hard I sprained my neck. I hope that doesn't happen to you.

Love,
Janie

Margaret said...

Well a chest infection would make anyone whine. I think a little whining is fine. One must indulge oneself sometime, after all.

D4 said...

I know the feeling. Get sour candies. I don't mean "sour" gummies or anything, I mean legitimately sour. Buy some lemons and squeeze em down your throat every once in a while too. Soothing AND healthy.

Tony Van Helsing said...

Vixen: It always feels like you'll never get better but you will. I hope.

Choleesa: At least I'm not the only one.

Pat: Wear a face mask, take no chances.

Janie: Thank you for your concern, appreciated. Mrs Van Helsing has made me sleep in the spare bedroom for the last two weeks, even though I'm the one who is ill.

Margaret: I love a good whine now and again.

D4: Might be worth a try, I've tried lemon Lockets but they are sweet rather than sour and don't do any good.

Padded Cell Princess said...

Two words: HOT TODDY!
Forget comfort food when you are sick, I'm all about the comfort drink! If I'm really feeling bad, then I change the recipe to hot whiskey in a lemon Lemsip mix and a bit of honey...back in the States I did it with lemon nighttime Therafu and it usually knocked me out before I could finish the mug!

Rob Z Tobor said...

Good luck with the recovery. These things may not be the worse thing by a long way but do sometimes feel like it.

I will mentally spray you with disinfectant while I run and hide.

Tony Van Helsing said...

Princess: I ditched all the ingredients except the whisky.

Rob: Brilliant, mentally spraying and running.

Brigitta Huegel said...

Dear Tony,
so sorry to read this - I wish you will get better soon!
I love the way men are, whether in good health or illness - then even the taciturn become verbose. Though maybe not when suffering from cough and sore throat. So get well soon, please!
PS: Maybe I can make you smile a bit: it was Husband who had to enlighten me that 'Tony van Helsing' might NOT be your real name, hahaha. I had never heard of HIM before - even at University it was my friend Ann who wallowed deep in stories about vampires - me always looking for something to laugh at. Now that's your turn - if it doesn't hurt too much...

Kelly Polark said...

Feel better, Tony!!

Tony Van Helsing said...

Brigitta: You are a true lady, thanks for the smile. And who is to say my name is not Van Helsing, it is a Mystery Theatre after all.

Kelly: Cheers babes.

Jerry E Beuterbaugh said...

"Tony Van Helsing's Mystery Theatre" has been included in the Sites To See for this week. I hope this helps to point many new visitors in your direction.

http://asthecrackerheadcrumbles.blogspot.com/2012/10/sites-to-see.html

Nicki Elson said...

Oh good, you've got the antibiotic. I hope you're feeling better by now. It is funny how we don't appreciate the miracle of a well-working body until one of the parts goes out.

Al Penwasser said...

Nasty green oyster?
So I'm guessing seafood isn't a comfort food.

Amy said...

I think everyone deserves a little comfort when they don't feel good. I don't mind the whine, as I know all too well how it feels to be under the weather.
Feel better soon!